FYI, the fake announcement post was really fun to write:
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$150 million investment from Andreessen Horowitz!
We are extremely excited to announce our new funding from some long time friends in venture capital, Andreessen Horowitz. They lead a $150 million dollar private equity round at a $52 billion dollar valuation, which we will use to start generating revenue and take our software to the next level.
"We've scaled enough. It's time to monetize." -Richard Stallman, Founder, FSF
As part of this deal, we will begin to add per-use fees to many of the popular GNU software we maintain, such as "ls", "dd", "cat", "grep", and many more. You can check out our pricing update and documentation on Github. Supported tools now include a "--pricing" flag so you can keep track of how much you owe us. For example, you can type "gcc --pricing" to get the amount you owe from compiling all those continuous integration deployments.
"GNU is sitting on a hundred billion dollar opportunity, and I'm really excited they are capitalizing on it."
-Sam Altman, YCombinator
Thanks very much to all of our current contributers that have made this step possible. If it weren't for the hard work of you, we wouldn't be able have such an incredible position in the market and rich go-to-market strategy. As part of this fundrasing, we will be setting aside 10% of the investment to give back to the community that have made us so very, very happy.
"They got embedded in all the huge enterprise companies on the backs of volunteers! Now they can flip on the revenue stream. I really respect Richard for his cutthroat business strategy."
-Larry Ellison, Oracle
Unfortunately, some long time friends in the Linux community will not be joining us in our journey, namely the Linux kernel, so we will be using $50 million from this funding to complete the GNU Hurd kernel on an accelerated timeline so that our current users don't experience any interruption of service.
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$150 million investment from Andreessen Horowitz!
We are extremely excited to announce our new funding from some long time friends in venture capital, Andreessen Horowitz. They lead a $150 million dollar private equity round at a $52 billion dollar valuation, which we will use to start generating revenue and take our software to the next level.
"We've scaled enough. It's time to monetize." -Richard Stallman, Founder, FSF
As part of this deal, we will begin to add per-use fees to many of the popular GNU software we maintain, such as "ls", "dd", "cat", "grep", and many more. You can check out our pricing update and documentation on Github. Supported tools now include a "--pricing" flag so you can keep track of how much you owe us. For example, you can type "gcc --pricing" to get the amount you owe from compiling all those continuous integration deployments.
"GNU is sitting on a hundred billion dollar opportunity, and I'm really excited they are capitalizing on it." -Sam Altman, YCombinator
Thanks very much to all of our current contributers that have made this step possible. If it weren't for the hard work of you, we wouldn't be able have such an incredible position in the market and rich go-to-market strategy. As part of this fundrasing, we will be setting aside 10% of the investment to give back to the community that have made us so very, very happy.
"They got embedded in all the huge enterprise companies on the backs of volunteers! Now they can flip on the revenue stream. I really respect Richard for his cutthroat business strategy." -Larry Ellison, Oracle
Unfortunately, some long time friends in the Linux community will not be joining us in our journey, namely the Linux kernel, so we will be using $50 million from this funding to complete the GNU Hurd kernel on an accelerated timeline so that our current users don't experience any interruption of service.
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https://diafygi.github.io/gnu-pricing/website/