FFS! I never said anything about ignoring your kid, and yet somehow my words have been twisted to mean this.
Hopefully if I explain my beliefs further you'll see what I mean. Yes, I believe that kids should be encouraged to be self-reliant from a young age, because I believe ultimately every individual only grows off their own impulses, and the job of an adult is to give a safe and loving environment for this process to unfold.
But a toddler might not have developed ideas of right and wrong, right? Isn't what I'm saying irresponsible? Again, no, because you can teach self-reliance. By talking through ideas with a kid, asking for their opinion, asking them to consider alternative points of view, you help teaching them how to make sense of their options. This process still requires attentiveness, but changes the parent-child relationship.
Perhaps the best example I know of in the real world was the way Feynmann's dad taught Feynmann to explore his curiosity... The Importance of a Father: http://youtu.be/695Flhmjmg4
Going back to the original article, imagine the kid in the video is a younger version of yourself. If you could go back in time to pass on a message to this younger you, what would you tell him? Personally I'd tell him it's okay to play, but he'd only truly understand why if he could reason for himself.
Finally, I realise that parenting is a big responsibility, and consequently people worry about whether they're doing it right, so let me be clear... I am not criticising you, I don't even know you, all I am saying is what I would prefer to do, your decisions are yours to own.
Hopefully if I explain my beliefs further you'll see what I mean. Yes, I believe that kids should be encouraged to be self-reliant from a young age, because I believe ultimately every individual only grows off their own impulses, and the job of an adult is to give a safe and loving environment for this process to unfold.
But a toddler might not have developed ideas of right and wrong, right? Isn't what I'm saying irresponsible? Again, no, because you can teach self-reliance. By talking through ideas with a kid, asking for their opinion, asking them to consider alternative points of view, you help teaching them how to make sense of their options. This process still requires attentiveness, but changes the parent-child relationship.
Perhaps the best example I know of in the real world was the way Feynmann's dad taught Feynmann to explore his curiosity... The Importance of a Father: http://youtu.be/695Flhmjmg4
Going back to the original article, imagine the kid in the video is a younger version of yourself. If you could go back in time to pass on a message to this younger you, what would you tell him? Personally I'd tell him it's okay to play, but he'd only truly understand why if he could reason for himself.
Finally, I realise that parenting is a big responsibility, and consequently people worry about whether they're doing it right, so let me be clear... I am not criticising you, I don't even know you, all I am saying is what I would prefer to do, your decisions are yours to own.