> Somehow, the vast majority of our children manage to come out of them more or less intact.
I tend to agree. In retrospection, adolescent social environments rank among the most unpleasant experiences I've had in my life.
Not only unpleasant, but IMHO unproductively so. While I acknowledge it's difficult to objectively assess oneself, I genuinely can't help but view the worst adolescent trauma I experienced as anything more than a waste of time.
We often forgive a lot of abuse effected by children and towards children as a "natural" part of development. I don't hold that view. If I can spare my kids similar experiences, I certainly will. Life is preciously short, and we owe it to ourselves not to waste energy on the absolute wheel-spinning nonsense that kids all too often inflict on each other.
If you're lucky, bullying can teach you how to deal with completely unreasonable people and how to play social and legal games to retaliate when someone fucks things up for you. This has been my experience for bullying that happened early in my adult life. You need to be in the right place to get anything good out of it, though.
I tend to agree. In retrospection, adolescent social environments rank among the most unpleasant experiences I've had in my life.
Not only unpleasant, but IMHO unproductively so. While I acknowledge it's difficult to objectively assess oneself, I genuinely can't help but view the worst adolescent trauma I experienced as anything more than a waste of time.
We often forgive a lot of abuse effected by children and towards children as a "natural" part of development. I don't hold that view. If I can spare my kids similar experiences, I certainly will. Life is preciously short, and we owe it to ourselves not to waste energy on the absolute wheel-spinning nonsense that kids all too often inflict on each other.