Please consider that this stuff is very nuanced, and that while you clearly care about these issues a lot (as do I!), your analysis betrays a lack of understanding.
Any way you want to cut it, these results are not to be trusted. You cannot even be sure the conclusions are true. The effect sizes are within measurement error.
>a massive (N=689,00!)
Your critique reads like someone whose never done any research or serious statistical work. Big N's don't automatically mean the results are robust.
I'm sorry, this isn't the groundbreaking paper you want it to be.