I have been meditating 20 years now (zazen). I do 2-4 hours a day. Several 7 day retreats per year.
My starting motivation was philosophical and academic interest. I was curious how it affects the mind. Then I did it because it seemed so hard to do, mind seemed like a buggy device I had no control over. I also had self improvement goals at some point. And feeling balanced is a good feeling.
But there is no way I can justify the amount of time I spend meditating with any of those. Meditation teachers say that first you start to work with meditation, then it starts to work with you. The whole view of the world changes.
I'm completely secular humanist but meditation has turned into spiritual practice. If I worship something, it's this moment. Asking why I meditate is like asking why people go surfing. Staying in the moment and balancing on the wave between the past and the future is not a activity you do for gaining any other goals. Being alive and experiencing the raw existence is something you sacrifice other things in your life.
I knock out 30 minute sittings daily. I wish I a) had that kind of time to devote and b) had the wherewithal to regularly sit that much. All-day sesshin is a killer for me after about two sittings.
What is this anxiety? Does it come from the fear of non-existence? I will be dead some day, and I surely don't want to spend my limited existence staring into the void. Gotta keep moving!
The point is to keep your mind focused on one still thought. Letting your mind wander around won't do much. Complexity of the thought should match your ability. Lam-rim says that more short meditations is better than one long meditation. Ideally, one would meditate 16 times a day. And again, the whole point is to stay focused on one thought.
Do you usually sit in seiza posture, or do you prefer agura for such lengthy sessions? I can put up with an hour in seiza, but four hours must require a fortitude of mind that I can't even begin to fathom.
> I do 2-4 hours a day. Several 7 day retreats per year.
I did the same in my 20s, but then slowly, my interest in sitting for hours a day, long retreats, faded. Not sure why, the experience itself is obviously deep, but it became a kind of attachment like coffee, and gradually I returned to the world.
> If I worship something, it's this moment
Wonderfully put.
May I ask, if you didn't sit, would this moment cease? Put differently, without practice would something be lost?
how do you find the time - sorry for asking personal questions but do you work full time, what about kids stuff?
I try but unable to consistently commit more than 20 min on an off.
I work part time. I work in a small company that is very accommodating.
It seems relatively common that people who work full time can do 2 hours if that's really what they want to do. You cut down other activities, like watching Netflix etc.
My starting motivation was philosophical and academic interest. I was curious how it affects the mind. Then I did it because it seemed so hard to do, mind seemed like a buggy device I had no control over. I also had self improvement goals at some point. And feeling balanced is a good feeling.
But there is no way I can justify the amount of time I spend meditating with any of those. Meditation teachers say that first you start to work with meditation, then it starts to work with you. The whole view of the world changes.
I'm completely secular humanist but meditation has turned into spiritual practice. If I worship something, it's this moment. Asking why I meditate is like asking why people go surfing. Staying in the moment and balancing on the wave between the past and the future is not a activity you do for gaining any other goals. Being alive and experiencing the raw existence is something you sacrifice other things in your life.