Once you know it's a tactic you can't allow yourself to fall for it anymore or you'll end up trapped, regardless of what the final outcome is.

However it's not right to go around guessing that someone like this guy is using that tactic and ignoring what could be a serious cry for help when you have no idea if he's an abusive person.

Abusive people aren't always abusive by calculation. Sometimes this "tactic" is completely honest, at the moment.